Revolutionary Spirit

NPR has a report today on how Chinese Christians are finding it more and more difficult to separate their faith from political action. Because the church feels that Christians are given great responsibility of society, they are angering the Communist Party who is trying to be more tolerant of religion as long as religion stays out of politics. I was really intrigued by the reporter's explanation that many intellectual converts see Christianity as the key to both personal and national salvation and that this view does actually hold some validity seeing the role the Catholic church played in 1980’s Poland. As one lady quoted “I think that is the kind of persons Christians should be.”

I must say that I was also struck by the respect the report gave to this group of Christians, but perhaps this is understandable. They are risking everything for something most westerners would see as indelible good.

Platform 9 3/4

There are some people who I have never met and will probably never meet, but who I still love as fiercely as old and tested friends. Today, I was reminded that Joanne Rowling is one of these people. I am always taken aback by how much she respects and appreciates her readers, how she's never quite recovered from the realization that the masses love her stories, and how much she tries to use her new privileged status for global good.

There is a reason that I’m on a Rowling kick today. Thanks to Richard, I stumbled across an article announcing the title of the sixth Harry Potter book. I then followed the links to Rowling's own site. It seems that there was a rumored title also floating around that people where confusing with the new, revealed title. Rowling took it upon herself to set things straight explaining:

Information you take directly from this site will be truthful and accurate. (I might occasionally joke, but as time goes on, you’ll learn to tell when I’m joking). Do not trust anybody else claiming to have found information on this site that you cannot access, however seemingly convincing the images they provide to support their story.

If you are a Harry Potter fan, you’ll love the site. Go! Visit! There are wizards you've never heard of there!

(Oh...by the way...just so you'll know...the new title is Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.

By George, He's Got It!

My (soon to be) three-year-old friend, Jacob, can now count to cinq [5] - Uh, deh, twah, cat, sank.

He also informed me that passing his lemonade to him "was very sweet, Jamie!" Then he recited a Bengali nursery rhyme.

I also learned how to smile for a Fisher-Price camera. First you squint your eyes so you can barely see, then you show all your teeth with your lips in an oval (like Wallace & Gromit which he has never seen).

"Cheese!"

Thorns & Thistles

When you pick blackberries
Your body is stabbed
Your skin is scratched
Your fingers turn blue
Like a newborn bruise
Your shirt is torn
(But shirts should be old)
Your calves itch
(Jeans shouldn’t be rolled)
Flies hover
(You are covered in juice)
But soon you are filled

So walk home now
With baskets too full
Of a hundred conquests
On a summer's eve

”It’s Obvious Talking to her that her Heart Remains at Camp Bucca” [Corrected]

I had a conversation recently where I was told that, when in war, it is not always possible or appropriate to treat prisoners with dignity. I’ve also seen political comics mocking this notion, especially one in World Magazine when an Iraqi detainee is lounging in a recliner with a butler waiting on him hand an foot while a US soldier is asking if the detainee might share any information now. [Note: Both the conversation and the comic’s release were after the Abu Ghraib scandal broke.]

The comic especially infuriated me since it came from a Christian publication and I cannot find any justification in scripture to dehumanize someone. Anyway, all this is to say that I cannot say how much I appreciated NPR’s report, Angel of the Desert. It is about an Army Reserve Major named Stacy Garrity who was able to live out this idea of all humans should be treated with dignity. A colleague described it as “the most charitable, Christian act I think I’ve ever witnessed in my life.” As for me, she reminds me of Gladys Aylward in the way she embodied her beliefs and the power and healing this embodiment brought. Please give it a listen. It is so good to hear something good in the news. (Also, be sure to listen to the stories in the photo section.)

I Wanna Grab a Hold of That Little Song Bird

I attended a wedding at Duke Chapel this past weekend where there are no bathrooms. In my fast hunt for such a facility before the service began, I ended up at Duke Divinity School. I froze because I was overcome with desire - desire such as, "Hey...I want to go to Divinity School." I don't know what this means, though I did send an inquiry to RTS' Virtual Campus. They called a few minutes ago because the head of the program erased my email and thus my mailing address. However, all has been straightened out and we shall see where things go from here. I get on kicks sometimes. This may all prove to be nothing.

I also have everything ready to record a demo and I have some mighty, fine new material if I can say so without being too cocky. (I don't think it's too arrogant. I've been practicing the art for over a decade. Like anything, success here is achieved by sweat and tears.) The only problem is that I have no idea how to run the equipment. I need to keep reading the manual. It will click - be assured, self.

I also heard another story on NPR taken from StoryCorps. I am developing a mild obsession with this organization. I like the fact that they see everyone as having an historically important story. I know so many people with such interesting stories. I have the equipment (well, minus the microphone) - hopefully, I will find a way to collect stories as well. There's a fulfilling occupation for you!

M.I.A.

Consider this an update on life, books, etc. ...

• My iBook is finally ordered and has arrived. It’s good to have a computer of my own - especially now that we have the printer and internet working on it. The Mbox (a miniature recording device for music) should be here today or tomorrow. Now that I’m beginning to gain some Apple intuition, I should be about ready to learn ProTools. Fortunately, Mark Williams has offered his tutoring services.
  
  
• I was labeled a “such a feminist” by my pastor's wife for my statement that women’s groups wouldn’t be needed in the PCA if we had better doctrine regarding women’s role in the church and if women were not banned from anything excepting what is prohibited in scripture. If you don’t agree, blame either my Southern Baptist upbringing or Mardi Keyes' influence.
  
  
• I finished Love Walked Among Us by Donald Miller. It’s not a hard read conceptually or linguistically, but it is probably the hardest applicable read I’ve come across. Not only does he end with a long quote by Anne Lamott, he has this story about Spurgeon that I must paraphrase because my copy is already lent out: Basically, Spurgeon looses his wife in the crowd at a rally where he was to speak because he was so focused on his message. His wife, after being jostled around quite a bit, finally makes her way home where her mother tells her that she is thinking too much of herself, that her husband is a servant of God and she must understand this. When Spurgeon arrives home, he listens to her grief and then explains that she must understand that he must be, first and foremost, a servant of God. Miller then exclaims (after saying that Spurgeon was a wonderful teacher) that not only was Spurgeon not loving his wife, that he was blaming it on God!
  
  
• I also finished a biography on Gladys Aylward called The Small Woman by Alan Burgess. It’s a little chatty, but it's an amazing story of a woman who is so confident in God’s calling her to go to China that she pays her own way since the mission board had labeled her “unqualified.” She runs an Inn, is coerced into being a foot inspector by the Mandarin, works for the betterment of China’s poor and oppressed, eventually becomes a naturalized Chinese citizen, and leads over a hundred children to safety during the Japanese attacks of WW2 while she is suffering from typhoid. I thought this quote summed her principles up well:

  In this land of high mountains and deep valleys, where living was meager and hard, Gladys grew to maturity. All that had gone before was a preparation for this, and this only a preparation for what was to come. She understood here that any religion which attempted to act as a chastity belt, or which was thin, humorless and arid, would be rejected by these simple mountain folk as they had rejected every other form of invasion. The religion she preached was a simple one. It told of strength through humility, wisdom through love, and life everlasting through faith. [86]

Well, that is it for now. I hope you enjoy the hyperlinks.

The Longest Sabbath Ever

Sunday afternoon, it was discovered that the entire family had planned to be out-of-town this coming weekend. I, being the only one without a time-sensitive obligation, was obliged to cancel to take care of the animals. The plan was to go visit old friends in Asheville and I have to say that this was the only thing I was really looking forward to this summer. I think what stung the most was the pure logic of the decision. I needed a bit of pity, not an exhortation to learn to remember things better. I think I just wanted to be seen and to have my hopes treasured.

In the midst of this, I decided I should go visit my grandmother soon, that I needed to rest and that I would able to do so if I visited her. Then I remembered that this is no longer an option and that it will never be an option until I leave this earth. I think what I miss the most is the way she would look at me and actually see me and think I was wonderful, or the way everything else was cast aside when I would walk in her door because I was the more important. This was her greatest gift – at least in my eyes. It’s strange - we lost her a year and a half ago, but sometimes it still stings with newness and the world seems to be a darker place.

I’ve also been struck by how little control I have over life - others I treasure may be taken from me; responsibility will prevent me from achieving what I dream, even the little dreams; loved ones will hurt me, though hopefully unintentionally – and there is very little I can do to prevent any of this. The scary thing is that we are commanded to love which makes us extremely vulnerable. I must learn to walk in my family’s shoes even if it doesn’t seem that they are doing the same for me. I cannot hold grudges. I must treasure and adore others while recognizing that time is fleeting and they may be lost. The problem is not only that I suck at this, but that I have no desire to do this. Honestly, I just want these things done for me while I sit back and enjoy them.

This is a dark post and I don’t really have anything optimistic prepared to end it. My apologies.

More Jacob Stories

I spent Friday night babysitting my pastor’s son. Here are a few anecdotes.

• As we were watching the parents leave from the kitchen window, Jacob turns to me and asks, “What car do you think they’re gonna take, Jamie?”
  
  “I think they’ll take the one in the driveway,” I responded.
  
  “No, I think they’re gonna take Jamie’s car!”
  
  
• Kim, Jacob’s mother, had ordered to pizza for dinner. (Jacob informed her that I like pepperoni pizza the best – it’s not true; I prefer plain cheese.) After I had cut Jacob’s pizza so he could eat it himself, he becomes very serious and stated, “You know what Jamie? Pizza makes people happy some of the time.”
  
  
• After his bath, I begin counting in French – un deux trois – as I put Jacob’s pajama’s over his head – un deux trois – his arms through the sleeves – un deux trois – his socks on his feet - un deux trois - which Jacob thought to be the funniest thing I said all night, so much so he could barely stand up. However, he somehow figured out I was counting because the next morning he exclaimed, “UH, DEH, TWOIS, CAT, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN!”

I Wish That You Could See Me Flying In My Dreams

There was a great interview with Patty Griffin today on NPR’s Morning Edition. Please check it out if you have time.

I only started listening to Patty recently, but it’s hard to remember this. My friend Mark had recommended her about three years ago, but I only bought her album two months back. When I called Mark to tell him that I was blown away, he merely replied, “I thought you’d like her.”

So what is it that draws me in? I think part of it is that music, like all the arts, is a grand conversation that has been taking place across the centuries. I’ve been hearing Patty quoted by many of the songwriters I have been influenced by – only I didn’t know I was hearing her voice. There is something extremely powerful in discovering the source of something so familiar. I can even look back at my own repertoire and see that many songs I have written have been part of this post-Griffin conversation - odd because I haven't written anything since I started listening to her.

However, it must be more because her music tears me to shreds. It took me two weeks to finish “Living with Ghosts.” There was something so right that it was painful, like when you must close your eyes because a sunset is too stunning. I think this comes, in part, by her paradoxical look at reality: hope next to despair, love next to broken hearts, poverty next to success. Sometimes I get a sense of her waving her hands in the air shouting that the world is not right, but that there is a right and maybe one day we’ll find it.

I also think she has given a validity to my own songwriting that no amount of “I really like that” can give because I able to look at her outside of myself. The truth is that I write really sad music, but I feel pressure with Asher Lev to draw something pretty - only I can’t. However, maybe there is something healing in a sad tune.

I’ll leave you with a quote from Gillian Welch’s “Miner’s Refrain” –

Now there's something good in a worried song
For the trouble in your soul
'Cause a worried man who's been a long way down
Down in a deep dark hole

More Childish Quotes

I spent Memorial Day with a couple of families from my church. After having been around for twenty minutes of so, a blond, three-year-old girl pointed at me and exclaimed to her mother, “That looks like Jamie from church!”

"It is, honey, it is."